And how it's make you hurt really much.

hai semuaaaaa \(._.)/ cerita cerita saya akan dimulai............. harap anda yang ingin membaca cerita saya sudah dapat membaca tulisan. #YouDon'tSay. Jadi ceritanya aku uda selesai melewati ujian tengah semester 2 alias mid semester 2. Tentunya dengan perjuangan, yaitu belajar sampe kurang tidur + tidak tergoda untuk mencontek temen. #grace #kuat #imannya. well, aku kurang tidur.. 5 jem.. for what?! just for thing that called "nilai, score, test". sakit? banget. Dan sekarang, aku berharap aku berada di kutub utara biar bisa hibernasi 12 taon. Semoga segalanya terpenuhi dengan hasil yang memuaskan. Aku hanya dapat berharap dapet nilai bagus semuanya dan ga remed. Sejauh ini, masih belom ada remedial sih aku.. tapi i'm scared. TwT and banyak sih yang nanya ke aku... tapi aku jawab gara" ga berani bilang engga.. ._. i'm scared... i'm scared that they will hate me, keep distance from me, bully me.. i'm scared.. i didn't know how to handle this. Kata koko gw, mereka dewasa sebelum waktunya... tapi gw bersyukur sama Tuhan kalo gw forever children :3 i don't wanna grow up. Grow up is the bad thing i never wanted. Aku uda selalu berusaha jujur... tapi kenapa yang ga jujur selalu dapet nilai bagus? i think it's not a big deal. Why? i study really hard and get a average grades or even poor grades. But, they? how can just they get a high score or even a really good score just because they cheating? But, i keep my trust in Jesus. I know Jesus won't let evil win. Keep the faith! :) Sebenernya sakit juga ya punya temen.. apalagi yang kayak gitu. Kadang, mereka ngomong juga ga sadarin hati kita sakit.... atau gmana gitu lah. I'm just tired of this all. Dijauhin, dimusuhin, dijutekin...... gw mungkin manusia dari manusia paling hina di dunia...... sampe digituin. Ya gitu deh, kalo kita gaada kegunaan atau manfaat mah... jangan harap bisa hidup kali di dunia kayak gini.

Hidup di dunia ini harus butuh :

- Kekayaan orang tua

- Kepinteran

- Kecantikan

Ga punya itu semua? M a t i. Kadang, kita juga ga sadar kalo kita uda nyakitin hati orang... karna kita semua egois, ga pernah mikirin yang lain.. kenapa ga pernah mencoba untuk mengerti orang lain? Terkadang, aku cape.... cape ngertiin orang lain tapi ga dingertiin.. cape!! Tapi, avatar datang kembali.. dan akhirnya aku ngerti.. bukan cuma aku doang yang kayak gitu. Banyak orang diluar sana, yang mungkin memiliki masalah yang jauh lebih besar daripada aku. Terkadang, banyak banget kata orang... yang katanya "mereka kaya, tapi belom tentu kan mereka bahagia? you never know they history" but, sometimes.. i see someone who wealthy and healthy.. it's having a good friends.. and they we're perfect enough. Having a talents, much money, beautiful.. and absolutely feel happy everyday. I just want to be like that... but God's said, "if you don't hurts and sacrificed then you don't deserve the heaven.". Maybe now, the only thing can make me calm down and feel save is talking to the Jesus. I never do it when exam started. God make me strong enough to facing the reality. Friends will forget us, Boyfriends/Girlfriends will leave us, Family will having they own business, but Jesus? will always be there, hearing your sob, healing your pain. All we need is lifting our praise to Jesus and offer our life to Him. Feel the Jesus, feel Him is knocking in front of you heart. feel it! deep inside.. He's waiting.. If not now, when you want to accept Jesus? you just need to trust Him. T R U S T. Don't wait, you'll never know when the last goodbye is. Have a right knowledge about Jesus, and tell other people about Jesus.. the right knowledge about JESUS. IF YOU CAN'T, PLEASE DON'T TELL THEM. IT'S JUST MAKING THEM AND ESPECIALLY YOU GOING TO HELL. PLEASE, DON'T IGNORE IT. THIS IS A WARNING FROM GOD. DON'T. IF YOU DON'T HAVING A RIGHT KNOWLEDGE. I TRUST GOD WILL GIVE ME THE RIGHT KNOWLEDGE ABOUT HIM IN THIS EVIL WORLD. TRUST IT'S ALL YOU NEED.

and that's it. i hope you can trust Jesus and know His kindness. 
now, it's been evening in Indonesia.. i should sleep and pray. 
bye all, Jesus bless! ><